Problems in upbringing children -

Problems in upbringing children

When you are 16 or 17, you want to be treated like an adult (1), to be more independent in your actions and your way of life. You want to develop interests and values different from those of your parents. That sets a conflict between the two generations, the generation gap (2). Young people disagree on different problems: the time to come home at night, doing work about the house, the friends to spend free time with, what clothes to wear and so on. At this period of our life we face a number of problems: difficulties in our relationships (3) with parents, problems at school, drinking alcohol or using drugs.

Different TV programmes and magazines for the young come to help teenagers, give a piece of advice. In case of need you can also dial a special telephone number, the so-called 'telephone of trust'. ,

But it's not the way out. Parents should help their children though it is difficult to be tolerant (4) and to find the right approach to them. We need to learn to talk our problems over (5) in our family. If we are able to do it everything will be all right.





CHILDREN: Upbringing of children. The generation gap. Teens. Adult children.


I. Upbringing of children.

1.- Each person's knowledge of how to bring up a child usually comes from their surroundings and their own upbringing. Children are going through their adolescence before their final adult characters are beginning to take shape.
2.- Some parents think it is good for children to be allowed to run wild without control or supervision. They say that this enables children's personalities to develop naturally and that they will learn to be responsible by the mistakes they make. However, this might lead to juvenile delinquency, with the children ending up in the courts, or it might simply make children self-centered, without any consideration for others.
3.- Other parents believe in being strict, but taken to extremes this can produce a too authoritarian atmosphere in the home, with the children being dominated and ruled by their parents. Parents can also be very possessive and try to keep their children dependent on them. These last two attitudes can encourage rebelliousness against parents, school, or, conversely, suppress a child's natural sense of adventure and curiosity.
4.- Discipline is important when bringing up a child. Through discipline a child learns that some kinds of behaviour are acceptable and others are not.

II. The generation gap.

1.- The generation gap is differences between people of a younger generation and their elders, especially between a child and his or her parent's generation. Old people are always saying that the young are not what they were. The same comment is made from generation to generation and is always true.
2.- These days, grown-ups describe children as difficult, rude, wild and irresponsible. The new generation has a very different view of the importance of work and money. The immediate post-war generation saw the creation of wealth as the most important thing in life, while today young people have other concerns and priorities. They have learned to take economic prosperity for granted and don't feel the need to be workaholics.
3.- Some teens say: They (the older generation) think differently; they have staid ideas and won't listen to new ones. Young people don't get listened to by either parents or teachers. Some older people think the young are getting very lazy.

III. Teens.

1.- The most painful part of childhood is adolescence. There is a complete lack of self-confidence during this time. Adolescents are over conscious of their appearance and the impression they make on others. They feel shy and awkward. Feelings are intense, easily from tremendous rapture to black despair. And besides friends are becoming more and more important these yeas. At schools there are cliques who decide what is "cool".
2.- Experts say that the rush to grow up is due to the mass media. Children desire to be independent and it creates behavior problems. Adolescents may rebel violently against parental authority.
3.- But even teenagers with supportive parents can fall in with bad company. A lot of children become addicted to drugs and alcohol because their life is hollow and they don't think of life-long goals.
4.- There are teens with rich parents, that give them money and expensive things. Envy and the desire to possess the same things can push teenagers to committing a crime and it leads to juvenile delinquency.
5.- Nowadays children start using computers very early. The electronic universe replaces their contacts with friends and dominates their life completely, that creates mechanical mentality and inhibits their emotional development.

IV. Adult children.

1.- Parents spend with the children all their childhood and adolescence. Then children begin to build their careers and family, become a parent. This time is quite hard for parents who they feel very lonely without their children.
This is the time when they have to shift from using parental authority with their kids to being friends of these new adults. Even adult children need love and guidance from their parents from time to time. As children pass into adulthood, the time for independence for both parents and children is very important for a healthy parent-child relationship.
The majority of parents and adult children experience some tension and aggravation with one another. But parents generally are more bothered by the tensions - and the older the child, the greater the bother.

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